Thursday, November 9, 2017

Learning To Live Like You’re Not Dying

I’ve spent the majority of my life thinking I would die. My entire life, I thought I had a weak immune system. I got these prolonged flus that lasted days. On top of that, when I was in college I was rear-ended by a semi and broke my neck and had a subdermal hematoma (blood clot) on my brain stem. I remember having a cvs episode in a halo on the neurological floor. My disease had yet to be diagnosed. They thought I was having a traumatic brain reaction. With my neck broken, they couldn’t bring themselves to tell me that my MRI showed that I would never have children. Well, I did have a child. Still, I did not know I had a disease and not a weak immune system. Until four years ago this last August. I’ve learned to live with this syndrome and to abate the majority of my symptoms. I called this journey my kobayashi maru or my no-win scenario. That is a Star Trek reference if you have never seen an episode. Well, I know how to live with this disease. I’m still chronically ill, but I know how to manage it. It’s another issue that I now face. I’m now a single mother. A single mother who is chronically ill. That means I have to figure out how to support and care and do this while managing my symptoms. This is my current no-win scenario. Remember, a few years ago I pondered disability. I did this while I was married. This brings me to faith. That is something I do have. I have faith that I will overcome this current situation. I’ll do it while managing my cvs. God Bless, Tammy

Friday, November 3, 2017

Patsy Clark's

Here's a spooky favorite. Message me at if you would like a signed print.

Monday, October 30, 2017

Going To The Emergency Room Dressed As An Inmate

On my way out I heard a man say, "Her shirt says State Inmate on it." I figured he was referencing me, so I turned around. I saw he was standing outside an room at the e.r. I was at. He looked like a guard. My guess is he was guarding an actual inmate. I was simply in an inmate get up. I was supposed to have gone dressed up to a Halloween party. I missed it though. I ended up having a cvs episode and going to the emergency room.

My doctor laughed about my handcuffs before he gave the order to the nurse to insert an Iv. Into me and give me intravenous Zofran and Benadryl.

Sure, I missed a really awesome party. Sure, I missed going dressed up. However, my emergency room visit was so wonderful.

I walked right in and told them I have cvs. They handed me a puke bag and got me into a bed right away.

In my experience, hospital beds are super comfy at first. They don't start getting uncomfortable until you're feeling better. That way you'll want to leave. I swear there's a science to it.

I remember earlier that day thinking I was coming down with an episode. I prayed that I wouldn't get one. It was then I heard a voice say, "You never know who you will meet when you go there."

And I did meet someone. I met an amazing nurse who had his own journey to wellness. Thank you so much for helping me.

To this day, I still go to the hospital when I start having an episode. However, I only have an episode occasionally. I am so grateful for this.

Happy Halloween :)